You can’t tell me it’s free


Dr Pep.jpgWant a free Dr. Pepper?

 I guess somewhere in the Dr. Pepper laboratories, someone opened their mouth and made a bet stating there was no way Guns and Roses new CD “Chinese Democracy” would be released before years end.

If the CD hit the stores by the cutoff of years end, everyone in America would get a “free” Dr. Pepper.

guns-n-roses-chinese-democracy.jpgWell it was, fourteen years in the making, and it goes on sale this weekend. You can bet I’ll be knocking over ladies in their mid-forties with way too much makeup on, sporting supertight low cut jeans to get my copy…NOT !




 Please retired rockers, not all 80’s hair bands need to re-unite.

Beginning Sunday at 12:01 a.m., coupons for a free 20-ounce soda will be available for 24 hours on Dr Pepper’s web site.

You can redeem those bad boys until Feb 28th, 2009.




 (Axl Rose, dude what happend to you?——–>)

Ok here we go, I don’t get the Dr. Pepper tie-in with Guns and Roses. Why would they give a schit when or if ever  the Guns and Roses CD was released?

 Why would they venture into such uncharted territory?  What do they have to gain from such a gamble?

Thumbnail image for free-beer-sign.jpg


It’s simple,

free A-D-V-E-R-T-I-S-I-N-G. The word F-R-E-E attracts people. I’ll admit, it catches my eye.

Thumbnail image for Great idea.jpgIt’s a brilliant idea, think about it. A soda costs roughly ten cents to make, just a guess. 

In a country as populated as the USA, they’re bound to be numerous Dr. Pepper “virgins”, who will redeem the coupon, drink the stuff, like it, and get hooked.

Bam,…small investment paid for.

 Here is a statement from Tony Jacobs, Dr Pepper’s vice president of marketing.  

“We never thought this day would come, but now that it’s here, all we can say is: The Dr Pepper’s on us.”

smokingdonkey.jpgYea right, let me bend over and move to the right a little bit because the smoke he’s blowing in my direction is missing its intended spot.

 So lets see,…..they’re gaining new customers because the free soda promotion creates a “buzz” with all of the free publicity (so by writing this I’m part of the hype, I realize this).

Plus, how many people will actually download the coupon?

 That by the way, is genius in itself. We pay for the paper and the ink = zero coupon expense for Dr. Pepper.  

Finally, how many people will pay for the gas to drive somewhere to redeem it?

See,.. their investment is minimal compared to the potential rewards. I hope not, but I believe I’m starting to see an ugly trend.  

chalupa.jpgGive that guy who thought up this whole free Dr. Pepper thing a free Chalupa, but give him a code and make him go online to redeem it.  Then tell him he has to do it between 4pm and 6pm. 

Then ask him how much he enjoyed his “free chalupa”.Getting played.jpg


 Let me officially say I’m tired of free schit that ain’t free.

Free is, I casually walk into the 7-11, open the cooler, take out a Dr. Pepper, walk past the clerk and say, “thanks man, this one’s on the Dr”.

We all know that isn’t going to happen.

You can’t play me like that Dr. Pepper or any other company considering a similar promotion.

 I see through it. Please stop this misleading crap now, it dumbens (that’s not a’s my word) America. 

No need to speed up the process. 


 America, you don’t need anything for free. It feels much better inside when you work for it.

Not paying for your stuff outright is what has got this country all F’ked up right now..

Want something free? Go hug someone, that’s truely free and it doesn’t use ink or kill a tree.

         Dr. Pepper, you have been Ranted…D
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  1. "D" The Rockpile Ranter

    You’ve got a classy thing going yourself man..You write a great blog, thanks for rolling your mouse this way…D

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